Sewing and Me: a potential fiasco
I have a favorite pair of pajama pants. I paid more for them than anyone should pay
for pajama bottoms. But in my endless
litany of justifications for impulse purchases, these stand out singularly for
their long-term impact. They have been
an inspiration to me, a frustration to others; they have brought both
hostilities of unkind words and ensured the warmth of friendship. Yet before you go drawing conclusions as if
this was a tale of seedy character, I will explain.
I am basically a cheapskate.
That is how I get away with owning so much “stuff.” I barter.
I search for deals. I trade. I replace.
I DIY. But there are certain
areas where one cannot afford to cheap-out.
I put my loungewear into that category.
So when I was at a local outdoor and country outfitter store and saw a
soft brushed cotton pair of PJ bottoms with my favorite inspirational slogan
about Life…. normally attributed to a person with a happy dog, I thought: those babies are mine! I broke down and paid for a brand name
product.
And I wore those pajama bottoms until they were thread
bare. Well, until nearly I was
bare! And then a brilliant idea dawned
on me. Why can’t I just buy a few yards
of soft brushed cotton and use the original pair for a pattern and sew my own pj’s? Why? I
will tell you why: because sewing doesn’t
work that way.
I have gotten away with making curtains for some of the
rooms in my house. I like them. But they aren’t going to win any prizes from
real seamstresses. And sure as heck, no
one would ever dream of asking me to sew their wedding dress. Or their sundress. Or their anything, for that matter. There are imperfections that came about
during the “manufacturing process” at my kitchen table that I am willing to
live with… but someone else might not be.
And thus the pajama “problem” began.
I laid my old pajamas inside out on top of the new fabric
and just mentally added an inch everywhere.
Well, I added the inch everywhere except the place where I needed to add
more than an inch. Like, ahem, the
backside…. And the front side. So when I
finished sewing them together with lightning speed – beautiful straight lines
up the inseams – and attempted to put them on I realized one of two things
needed to happen: either I needed to get
shorter (yeah, like I want that to happen)
or the top of the fabric had to grow up and out somehow. So I added a band piece.
Do not ask me to explain technically what happened next,
because I don’t think I can even reproduce it if I tried. But the pajamas ended up with extra
material. So I just folded it so it
would have a “fly” in the front and in the back and sewed it closed…. Because
girls don’t need flies. And that is all
I can say about that.
I tried them on again and there was some sort of a
problem. I brought them to the attention
of one of my friends who is an expert seamstress and she spent over an hour –
but she claims it was considerably more
than that – at my kitchen table making the necessary adjustments. Finally we had a nice looking product … which
still didn’t fit me. So, not unlike a movie about traveling pants, I put them in
a box and shipped them home to my family.
My family can always be counted on to give brutal honesty… even when you
ask them to hold their peace. So the pj’s
came back with me.
They really did look great when they were done, by the
way. They were kind of a tie dye blue pattern
and would be very comfortable. I didn’t
want them to go to just anyone so I
wrapped them up and brought them to my birthday party where we did the Yankee
Gift Exchange game. The friend that
sewed them was at the party also. When
her turn came, I said, “don’t take that package over there; just trust me on
this.” Our other friend opened
them. And she said, “these are GREAT!”
and ran straightaway to the lav to put them on.
She came out and modeled the perfect pair of PJ’s. She still loves them. And I love the fact that my imperfect efforts
became a cooperative work that someone I care about gets to enjoy.
But I will say this.
Any time I want to get my seamstress friend cranked out of shape I just
say, “It’s kind of a nice day to work on a project. I think I’ll sew some pajamas.” She lets out a sound of exasperation and
replies: “Yeah, right. With two flies?”
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